Wednesday, May 1, 2019

Salvation Run #4 (April, 2008)


On Hell Planet, Martian Manhunter had been impersonating Blockbuster for the past thirteen days as part of an operation he was coordinating with Batman to find all those recently missing super-villains. Now, he was trapped incommunicado on a world so far from any he knew that there was no semblance of a direction home. The villains were turning on each other on a planet that appeared engineered to be as deadly as possible. And hiding in the bushes, observing J'Onn's futile effort to communicate with Batman, Catwoman found this development "Verrrry interesting."

One week later, tensions within Lex Luthor's camp continued to rise. Lady Vic confronted "Blockbuster" with his charade, not recognizing this man as the one she knew "very well." At least there were some support systems there. It was every man for himself at Joker's camp, as Gorilla Grodd shoved a bamboo rod in Bolt's hand so he could go hunt his own food if he wanted to eat. Grodd was eying Joker's chair when he was approached with a strategic alliance by Monsieur Mallah and The Brain. While Mallah tried to tout the apes' superiority to the humans, especially in a jungle setting, Grodd expressed repulsion at the comparison. "You absurd science experiment! ...You are an abomination!" It was Mallah's turn to be offended, and he lashed out, but was no match for Grodd's brute strength. In desperation, Mallah fired five slugs into Grodd's chest, only to be bludgeoned to death with The Brain's containment vessel, his one consolation being that he would die alongside his disembodied love. Weakened and wounded, the six-hundred pound Grodd was unable to prevent Joker's pallid, anorexic, dandy leg from from kicking him off an inconveniently located mountain ledge.

Vandal Savage had seen these downturns coming, and had convinced Lady Flash, Phobia, Nocturna, and the Cheetah to follow him into the wilderness. "Whether anyone develops the technology to escape or not, we'll be alive." Savage had already determined that the planet was technologically-based, and had located an isolated location wired for paradise...

"Life Is But A Dream Nightmare" was by Matthew Sturges, Sean Chen and Walden Wong. I stopped recapping this mini-series halfway through seven years ago for a number of reasons, not the least of which because these posts corresponded with lengthy simultaneous synopses of other titles across numerous blogs at a time when audiences for that format were dwindling. The New 52 had also gone into effect, rendering the continuity these stories took place in moot. But most importantly, it's because I hated what a vicious and stupid effort this mini-series was, and I was particularly disgusted at the thinly motivated ape massacre in this issue. It was DC not only disowning its innocent past of evil talking gorillas, but relishing in adulterating their very memory in as cruel and distasteful a way as possible. Its utter contempt for its own past creators and their output inspire contempt in me for them. I wanted no more to do with it then, and now, I just want to sort out my loose ends and draft copy for a podcast adaptation as part of a larger overview of this era.

Census: Abra Kadabra, Bane, Black Spider, Blockbuster (Martian Manhunter), the Body Doubles, the Brain, Brutale, Captain Cold, Catman, Catwoman, the Cheetah, Chemo, Cicada, Clayface, Deadshot, Dr. Light, Dr. Sivana, Effigy, Fatality, General Immortus, Giganta, Girder, Gorilla Grodd, Solomon Grundy, Hammer, Heat Wave, Hellhound, Hindenberg, Hyena, Ibac, Iron Cross, Jewelee, Jinx, Jongleur, Kid Karnevil, Killer Croc, Killer Frost, Leather, Lex Luthor, Lockup, Mad Hatter, Magenta, Mammoth, Man-Bat, Manticore, Meanstreak, Metallo, Mirror Master, Mr. Freeze, Mr. Terrible, Monsieur Mallah, Neutron, Phobia, the Prankster, Professor Ivo, Psimon, Rag Doll, Rock, Scandal Savage, Shadow-Thief, Shimmer, Shrapnel, Sickle, Silver Monkey, Silver Swan, Splitshot, Sterling Silversmith, Skorpio, Sonar, Hugo Strange, Tapeworm, Tar Pit, Tremor, Tweedledee, Tweedledum, Two-Face, Warp and Weather Wizard.

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