JLA/JSA Secret Files & Origins #1 (January, 2003)

Unlike JLA/JSA: Virtue and Vice, I bought the related Secret Files book new. For starters, it was only $4.95, equivalent to $8.63 for a 64 page special. A better deal, I'd say. Also, I bought nearly all of the Secret Files books new, because I love DC's Who's Who-style comic format reference editions, as evidence by my having started a devoted podcast to them. But perhaps most importantly, because all of the character interaction stuff that I wanted from a JLA/JSA meet-up but was cut from Virtue and Vice ended up here. There's the explanation of who Captain Marvel and the Wizard Shazam even are, how they and the Rock of Eternity relate to The Seven Deadly Enemies of Man, and the story ends on a neat horror movie beat. There's Mr. Terrific checking out mementos in the Batcave, including a framed picture from the first JLA/JSA meet that includes J'Onn J'Onzz. Setting aside the painful Ace Ventura version of Plastic Man from this period, there's a cute grouping of two Flashes and an Hourman at a professional hockey match. There's The Atom going microscopic to study the mystical emerald flames that Green Lantern Alan Scott is made up of. How about Wonder Woman, Power Girl, and Stargirl rating the hotness of their teammates? Or Zatanna at the Tower of Fate? This was all the good stuff cleared out for empty spectacle. "The Day Before" was by Geoff Johns & David S. Goyer and Stephen Sadowski & Andrew Pepoy.

But that's not all! As per usual, there's a bunch of short stories and character profile pages by some notable talents. Most relevant here is the Department of Extranormal Operations feature, a regular part of Secret Files books, and also the organization J'Onn J'Onzz ran (as Hank Henshaw) on the CBS/CW Supergirl. TV show. In the comics, that was Director Bones' job. If you saw Thunderbolts*, it's hard not to think of its take on La Contessa Valentina Allegra de la Fontaine being a whitewashing of the DCEU's Amanda Waller. Technically, Bones is a cynical African-American along the lines of Ultimate Nick Fury, whom he predates, but it's easy to forget that part when all anyone can see is a talking (and smoking) skeleton. No confuse of who's who there. Anyway, the story involves the Director intentionally leaking controversial information on the D.E.O., and seeing how long it takes Earth's heroes to confront them regarding the misinformation. Just over an hour, as it happened, with the Martian Manhunter among those heroes. "Telephone" was by Dan Curtis Johnson, Kelly Yates, & Mick Gray.

Podcast- John Ostrander & Mark Verheiden at Comicpalooza 2016

Episode #27

Look for us on iTunes, ShoutEngine or directly download an art-tagged MP3 from the Internet Archive

Straight out of Comicpalooza - Texas' Largest Comic & Pop Culture Event comes new interviews with screenwriter/producer Mark Verheiden discussing his work on J'Onn J'Onzz and Zook in Secret Origins and Superman/Batman, then writer John Ostrander covering his three year run on the 1998 Martian Manhunter ongoing series.


We enjoy dialogue on the red planet, so here are our non-telepathic contact options:

• Tweet host Diabolu Frank directly, or probe @rolledspine as a group.
• Email Diabolu
• If the main Idol-Head of Diabolu blog isn't your thing, try the umbrella Rolled Spine Podcasts.

Podcast- JLA: Day Zero (1994)

Episode #26

Look for us on iTunes, ShoutEngine or directly download an art-tagged MP3 from the Internet Archive

The Manhunter from Mars offers a final supplemental postscript to JLMay-- The JLA: Year One Podcast Crossover Event! Think of it as JuneLA, or maybe a JLMepilogue. In the third edition of JLA: Day One, Diabolu Frank discusses the controversial Zero Hour retcon of Triumph as a founding member of the Justice League, alongside the Post-Crisis Five and Superman, in Justice League America #92 (September, 1994)! Just keep telling yourself it never happened, because it never did, right from the beginning! In fact, that was kind of the whole point! Bookending that topic are excerpts from Chase #6 (July, 1998) and Martian Manhunter #17 (April, 2000) covering the retroactive continuity predecessors to the JLA, the Justice Experience and their mysterious member Bronze Wraith...

From here follow JLMay to these fantastic podcasts! Each will cover different issues of JLA: YEAR ONE and each will come out in May! And don’t forget to use the hashtag #JLMay when discussing on social media!

1. Justice League of America #9 (February, 1962)
   -1. Justice League of America #144 (July, 1977)
   0. Justice League America #92 (September, 1994)
2. Secret Origins Podcast #32 (1988)
3. JLA: Year One #1 & #2 on Aquaman and Firestorm: The Fire and Water Podcast ep. 163
4. JLA: Year One #3 & #4 on The Power of Fishnets 6
5. JLA: Year One #5 & #6 on Waiting for Doom Episode 57
6. JLA: Year One #7 & #8 on The LanternCast
7. JLA: Year One #9 on Super Mates 54
8. JLA: Year One #10 on The Idol-Head of Diabolu 25
9. JLA: Year One #11 on Comic Reflections
   b)onus JLMay background episode!
10. JLA: Year One #12 on Views from the Longbox Episode 238

We enjoy dialogue on the red planet, so here are our non-telepathic contact options:

• Tweet host Diabolu Frank directly, or probe @rolledspine as a group.
• Email Diabolu
• If the main Idol-Head of Diabolu blog isn't your thing, try the umbrella Rolled Spine Podcasts.

2014 "Fan-Casting DC's MARTIAN MANHUNTER" by Ryan Daly

You may recall that Ryan "Count Drunkula" Daly of the Black Canary blog Flowers & Fishnets already cast his own "Justice League movie" heavy with Martian representation here, but he also took the time to expand that into a full solo Sleuth from Outer Space feature film. Besides Dolph Lundgren as Mongul and Sam Neill as Gorilla Grodd (which I can roll with, as seen in his Superman & Flash movie castings,) Daly has also given us some b-side album cuts from the Alien Atlas archives!

I thought Daly had picked Michael O’Neill for Captain Harding because of his similar role on Monk, only to find out that was actually Ted Levine. How good of a detective could Adrian Monk be when Buffalo Bill was right under his nose the whole time? Daly originally offered Battlestar Galactica alums Katee Sackhoff and Tricia Helfer as Diane Meade and Cameron Chase, but then flipped them on account of my whining. I approve of Daly's inclination to cast people of color as characters of non-terrestrial color, but Freida Pinto seems kind of Mrs. for the more girlish Miss Martian, plus M'gann's affecting classic traits of earthly redheads skews her that much further away. Back before Don Cheadle blew up, I listed him for DEO Director Bones. Jeffrey Wright would certainly be a swell replacement, unless that Hunger Games bread goes to his head. Nina Dobrev's Gypsy is also in the mix somewhere.

William H. Macy is certainly an inspired Professor Arnold Hugo, and I really ought to get my own options down around here. I had Anthony Perkins for the fake 1966 movie write-up that I never completed, someone else in mind for the ersatz Smallville spin-off "Middletown" that I stalled out on, and a third possibility for a major motion picture. Blast my backburner! Tom Sizemore is a big ball of blue collar crazy, so he could certainly pull off the Human Flame. Franco Nero might just euro-up Dr. V to the correct degree. I'd have never thought of David Morse for Doctor Trap, but he's perfect, isn't he? Michael Wincott is a go-to evil dude in movies, and he offers an extremely nasty, distinctive voice that, praise be, isn't Keith David's. It occurs to me that most of these actors are TV heavy on IMDb. Wouldn't this make a snazzy show? AMC? HBO? Anybody? Check out the Comrades of Mars and Vile Menagerie casting sheets for more!

Count Drunkula Casting Department

• Superman Family
• Superman Supporting Cast
• Superman Foes 1
• Superman Foes 2
• Batman Family
• Batman Supporting Cast
• Batman Foes 1
• Batman Foes 2
• Batman Foes 3
• Wonder Woman
• Flash Friends
• Flash Rogues 1
• Flash Rogues 2
• Doom Patrol
• Firestorm Fans
• Firestorm Fiends
• Green Lantern Core
• Green Lantern Corps
• Green Lantern Cretins
• Green Lantern Corpses
• Green Arrow
• Hawkman & the Atom
• Shazam!
• Teen Titans
• Young Justice
• Titan Terrors
• Justice League
• JLA villains
• JSA 1
• JSA 2
• JSA 3

SurVILEvor Island: Doctor Trap

Mister Bones could not negotiate entry into the Vile Menagerie, cast aside by 60% of 15 votes.

As with the outgoing Mister Bones, Larry Trapp was featured in the short-lived Chase, which was being cancelled as the 1998 Martian Manhunter ongoing series was launching. Co-creator Dan Curtis Johnson was at first flattered that John Ostrander continued to use his toys once they were taken from him, until certain liberties were taken. Larry Trapp's wife was killed during a clash between humble super-heroes and super-villains from a time after the Justice Society retired but before Superman arrived in Post-Crisis continuity. Trapp became a serial killer of capes, among whom the father of Cameron Chase could be counted. This established Dr. Trap as DEO Agent Chase's most significant foe, though I don't believe she ever faced him in her own series. Imagine Johnson's surprise when Trap instead was co-opted as a minor Martian Manhunter foe, and his confrontation with Cameron used as a throwaway plot to help wrap Ostrander's series once it was canned.

D.C. Johnson was still writing short stories with the Chase characters in issues of DC's series of Secret Files and Origins specials, and had plans for one of his forgotten period heroes, the Bronze Wraith. He was a bit miffed when the character was redesigned as a Silver Age style hero who was secretly a false identity of J'Onn J'Onzz.

Dr. Trap also guest-starred in an issue of Harley Quinn alongside John Jones, Diane Meade and Bette Noir, which is more of an afterlife than any of the Manhunter from Mars cast had when the original strip ended. Still, Doctor Trap was created to be Cameron Chase's ultimate foe, which is why he debuted in her book, killed her father, and why his only appearances in the past decade and longest stint in any one book was a storyline that ran in the Kate Spencer Manhunter series featuring Chase. Even his major appearance in Martian Manhunter revolved around trying to murder Cameron and being stopped by the Alien Atlas. Trap is a Chase nemesis who has just crossed J'Onn J'Onzz's path a few times on his way to cut limbs off the Chase family tree. Trap lacks the technical expertise to be a true threat to the Martian Manhunter, which invokes the Joker Clause of the hero being culpable for the murders of a madman so long as it is within his power to end the creep but fails to do so. Dr. Trap diminishes the Martian Manhunter by association, and if you just want mad science gadgetry, Professor Arnold Hugo has a much greater claim to the role.

SurVILEvor Island: Mister Bones

Folks seemed to agree with my point about Weapons Master being a JLA/Bloodwynd villain more than a Martian Manhunter one, though by a narrow margin, 58% of 12 votes.

Coming up with one decent character at a time is difficult enough for comic book creators. One of the banes of writing a team book is the prospect of conceiving a whole group of adversaries at once knowing full well their appearances will be sporadic and that they're made to fall before your heroes. DC sped this problem to its nth degree by "luring away" disgruntled Marvel writers with the promise that they could edit their own work as they doggedly rode the coattails of the X-Men by throwing together deeply awful configurations of super-teams. The perplexing excesses of Mike W. Barr, Gerry Conway and Marv Wolfman have been well documented in the blogosphere, but the literary crimes of Roy Thomas haven't been illuminated near enough to my mind.



Roy Thomas was the heir apparent to Stan Lee in the '60s, and a central chemist behind the super-team formula that defines the genre to this day. Yet by the late '70s Thomas seemed most committed to churning out World War II fanfic involving Thor and Frankenstein teaming up with Hitler. Once Marvel turned inhospitable to that indulgence under Jim Shooter, Thomas packed up his kit bag and applied the same schtick at DC. Never better than mediocre, All-Star Squadron at least served the historic legacy of the Justice Society and DC's lesser/later acquired Golden Age lights. On the other hand, the spin-off Infinity Incorporated could only have lasted as long as it did thanks to the booming direct market's insatiable lust for obligatory collecting material. Readers had to replace the JSA title lost to the late '70s DC Implosion, and they were compelled to support the book about their descendants operating a paid super-service in 1980s Los Angeles (or else communism would win, I guess.) Never mind that these kids were so generic and inoffensive, it would seem inappropriate to single any one of them out for criticism, like complaining about individual grains of overcooked, tasteless rice. Things only got worse as Thomas' raison d'être, being the Earth-2 guru, came undone during the Crisis. Infinity Inc. seemed to operate on dream logic as it borrowed plot points from Chris Claremont without any established foundation for the developments. The book ended with a killing spree against Infinitors that would have been explained away as the deaths of magical clones, had DC not canned the damned thing before the deaths could be reversed. That's how, for instance the daughter of Earth-2 Wonder Woman and Steve Trevor the second generation Fury and a Silver Streak knock-off the undead son of the Hawks (who had somehow become Kirby's Sandman) conceived Morpheus' replacement Daniel in the Dreaming. Jeebus, I could do multiple essays taking apart that last sentence alone.



This brings us to Helix. Deep breath. Okay, Dr. Amos Love ran around injecting pregnant women with a mutagenic drug that warped their offspring, whom he would then kidnap and home school. Isolated and educated solely by the media, these kids formed a super-team after Doctor Love died. Despite patterning themselves after the JSA, Helix's first solution to their lack of sustaining funds was to kidnap an Infinitor for ransom. When that approach failed, Helix loitered in the background before turning on one another. Mr. Bones was the leader of this group, so the rudderlessness comes down to him.

Mister Bones was born with transparent skin and developed a lethal cyanide touch. Not especially useful abilities for a hero, but that didn't stop him from cosplaying as the Black Terror and being enlisted as a member of Infinity Inc. based on his looking cool, a sorely needed trait for that crew. One of Bones' legs was bitten off by a land-shark brethren, and was replaced with a cybernetic one. Then he accidentally killed the Star-Spangled Kid (redubbed Skyman) with a touch. Did I mention that Bones was secretly black and spoke only in a rhyming doggerel crap rap? That happened.



Infinity Inc. survived for as long as it did thanks to nepotism and art from the likes of Jerry Ordway, Michael Bair and Todd McFarlane. When it was put down in 1988, Mister Bones went away with it for a decade. He resurfaced as part of the ensemble cast of D.C. Johnson & J.H. Williams III's short-lived Chase series. We've recently seen an acclaimed late middle-aged clean cut Caucasian war hero lose his job as boss of the C.I.A. because his penis allegedly found sanctuary in a vagina that was not his wife's, so it was something of a stretch that a felonious screwball twentysomething African-American with a "speech impediment" and no formal education should be appointed as regional director in the highly sensitive Department of Extranormal Operations. However, he looked good in a suit, and artists will always prefer to draw a cigar smoking skull over a nondescript bureaucrat. Johnson even managed to subtly work in the rhyming as Bones gave marching orders to Agent Cameron Chase in the F.B.I. for metahumans. Technically though, he should have been Director Robert Todd, not "Director Bones."



Chase was something of a spiritual successor to Suicide Squad, which seemed to give license for John Ostrander to cannibalize its fresh corpse for his Martian Manhunter series. Cameron Chase was sent to investigate the murder of John Jones' partner in private investigations, and stumbled upon a list of the Alien Atlas' many international assumed identities. Director Bones tried to leverage this information to draft the Martian Manhunter into working with the DEO, or at least stop him from spying on the department. J'Onzz balked, so Bones released the list to the media, only to catch blowback when people took umbrage over their local hero being unnecessarily compromised. J'Onzz continued to cross paths with Cameron Chase, since he'd been grafted onto her origin story, but Bones seemed to fall off his radar.



Established as a creepier and more adversarial desk bound Nick Fury, Director Bones started having cameos all across the DC Universe. This led to a recurring role in another Manhunter series, in which vigilante prosecutor Kate Spencer was successfully brought into the DEO under Bones' supervision. After that book ended, J.H. Williams III carried Bones and Agent Chase over to his Batwoman series. This protected Bones from the arbitrary revisions of the New 52, although his Infinity Inc. backstory surely, and perhaps blessedly, did not survive.



When Director Bones started turning up in Martian Manhunter, he was a minor character from a trivial '80s team who'd lost his supporting role in a critically regarded but popularly ignored series. Under those terms, it made sense to absorb him into the Vile Menagerie. Nearly fifteen years later, Mister Bones is his own distinct entity appearing regularly in series involving entirely different manhunters, but most importantly, not having much of anything to do with J'Onn J'Onzz in the years since.

2012 Cameron Chase Space City Con Commission by Vo Nguyen

Click To Enlarge


One of the great things about Space City Con coming after Comicpalooza is that it gave me a second chance to amend some oversights in my commission list. At a con, it's easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment. I didn't realize until after the weekend was done and I surveyed the artwork that in an anniversary year meant to spotlight the Martian Manhunter's supporting cast, "good guys" were poorly represented. Part of the joke was that this would be a "Happy Zook Year," and I hadn't gotten anyone to do the other-dimensional pet, so who better that Art Adams? Not only could I get it done, but I could get it done up mighty nice.

Cameron Chase starred in her own short-lived series in 1998 by Dan Curtis "D.C." Johnson (who unjustifiably faded out of the industry) and J.H. Williams III (who has since become a modern idol.) Chase was the daughter of a deceased minor super-hero who grew up to become a private investigator before being recruited by Mister Bones for the DEO. As an agent of the Department of Extra-normal Operations, Chase investigated metahumans in the DC Universe, as basically the F.B.I. of the cape set. If that sounds a lot like the more successful creator-owned Powers series that started a couple of years later, yeah, it sure does. DC only gave the book nine issues, and Johnson got to continue with the property for a few years as short filler material in their Secret Files & Origins books. Johnson wore a John Ostrander influence on his sleeve, and even before Chase ended, Ostrander began appropriating aspects of the book for his new Martian Manhunter series. Johnson was both flattered and flustered, since Ostrander revealed that a contemporary of Chase's dad was the Martian Manhunter in disguise (where Johnson had other plans for the Bronze Wraith,) turned Mister Bones into an adversarial presence (instead of a penitent ex-villain,) and penned the confrontation between Chase and her father's murderer Doctor Trap as part of his single issue wrap-up of Martian Manhunter. Cameron Chase appeared in nearly as many issues of Martian Manhunter as her own book, and had a major impact on the series, so she rates inclusion here. It's worth noting that Chase also turned up in most issues of the Kate Spencer Manhunter series, to affirm her bona fides for representation.

Vo Nguyen had done a villain piece for me at Comicpalooza, but thanks to theme months and my posting schedule, the Space City Con commission has gone up first. Amusingly, Nguyen was now sharing a booth with Chris Beaver, who has also done two full color pieces for me, neither yet published. I enlisted both for Comrades of Mars though, so we should see some Beaver before the month is out. Anyway, Chase was one of a few character options I'd given Nguyen, but lacking a prepared model sheet, I'd brought a copy of Chase #7 as reference. Nguyen chose Chase based on the cover-- but thought that I wanted him to draw the demon. I corrected the assumption, but Nguyen stuck with his choice anyway. Nguyen tends to like darker subjects, and was apparently hellbent on getting the commission and his demon too. For $60, I got two figures in fully painted color with a modest background and slick perspective. Never underestimate the power of the muse, let me tell you. The scan takes major liberties with the coloring, which are much more moody and subdued in the art, but that wasn't translating very well digitally. About an inch of artwork is cropped off the bottom, because I couldn't fit the full 11 x 17" board on even a FedEx Office copier. I didn't have the same issue with the sides, and the white portions you see are only on the scan, since Nguyen filled virtually every bit of the board. He used his own Blue Line Pro paper, but you can hardly tell, because it is so soaked in paint that it might as well be an unstretched canvas. I need to get this framed and on the wall, because it is a fantastic piece that demands to be displayed!

For more, check out Vo Nguyen deviantART page and his Comic Art Fans gallery!

Martian Manhunter #6 (March, 2007)

In New York City, a SWAT team burst through the window of Rio Ferdinand, who was sleeping nude in bed. "Gee, if I'd known you boys were coming, I would'a made coffee.

At Middleton Woods Estates in Pennsylvania, J'Onn J'Onzz gathered his fellow Green Martians into one room like a parlor detective and announced that he suspected one of them in the murders of two humans. "Setting aside the shame you've brought upon our people, upon me, admit to your crime now and I promise I'll do everything in my powers to protect you." I love the emphasis on "me," as if the guy who has failed and browbeat this group constantly rated special standing.



Mica'kel was immediately indignant like a good red herring, which was pointless, since the reveal took up half of a facing page. Dal'en was the only Martian to stammer when asked point blank yes or no if he'd been up to some killin', like a child afraid of the switch. Given that mighty fine bit of dee-tectin' work, it's no wonder Dal'en was on J'Onzz, trying to gouge out his eyes with his friggin' thumbs, before the Manhunter from Mars could mount a defense. J'Onn had been offering Dal'en help, which was met by a left-field screech of "YOU CAN NOT HELP ME," which plays better if you imagine the voice as Richard O'Brien's in the last act of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Come to think of it, maybe the DCnÜ is just a delayed effect of Dal'en and Telok'Telar doing the Time Warp off-panel? J'Onn was all "You're among friends," but Dal'en was all butch please, "you have no idea-- what's been done..." before passing out. Hysterical.



Back in New York, the F.B.I. interrogated Rio over the murder of "Sully" Sullivan, based on a ten point match of her thumbprint on the field journal of Dr. Alex Ferguson. "Just so we're all on the same page... you're making a career-ending mistake here, fellas." Despite her bravado, Rio knew someone had purposefully blown her cover and fed her to the feds. One of her interrogators saw it in her eyes, and knowing she'd lose any tail they placed on her, thought it might be best to release her. That way, she could deal damage to her no doubt corrupt superiors, and on confirming she'd been sold out, would likely return the favor in kind.

In Gotham City, the Martian Manhunter felt uncomfortable about approaching Batman for a favor, especially in light of his estrangement from the Justice League. "It's ironic... although alien, Superman can be swayed by emotion. Batman, by contrast, is far more... exacting." Also, water is wet and a Martian probably shouldn't deal in xeno-stereotyping. The Dark Knight didn't feel it was safe for either of them to be meeting the other, and confirmed on questioning that one of J'Onn's Martians had killed the two D.E.O. agents. J'Onn felt that if there deaths were to have any meaning, Batman would turn over information on who ordered the transfer of Scorch from her captivity at S.T.A.R. Labs. "As a friend, I must ask you to trust me on this." In predictable fashion, Batman's answer was a simple, firm "No."



As Keane was returning home for the night in his limousine, Rio shot several of his guards and his driver in the head. Girl loves her head shots. "Give me one reason I shouldn't put one in you!" Keane explained that he had no reason to expose Rio, given that it would in turn expose him. Keane had previously suspected that Rio was in league with the presumed rogue Giggs, but with the evidence presented against Rio to the feds, now thought he might be after them both. Whoever was responsible, "I don't care what your job title is in the real world, Keane, I don't take the fall for anyone."

Lying unrestrained on a mattress elevated by a board and two sawhorses, Dal'en begged for death. His skin was now cracked and turning gray. "In the lab, they did something to me. I am not who you think I am. I'm not! I'm not myself!!" Dal'en could remember killing the two agents, but it was something like an out of body experience, and he now feared for his fellow Martians. "Please don't let me hurt the others."

J'Onzz consulted with the group and Sara Moore. He conveyed Dal'en's fear that he had been intentionally infected with the plague in the lab, and was still shocked a Martian could take a human life. J'Onzz sought confirmation through blood samples, and when Telok'Telar refused, one was taken by force. The samples would go with Moore to a friendly lab associate. Till'all would travel with her, while Telok'Telar and Mica'kel stayed to watch over Dal'en.



Her name is Rio and she visits Boston, Mass. Then in another panel, kindly shows her ass. And when she spies she hides evidence at Midland Savings & Loan. Oh Rio, Rio, how you plot when you're on your own. Also: U-Store Rental, Waterford, CT. I guess you can hit that many states on the Eastern Seaboard in a day. Here in Texas, you spend a day trying (sometimes vainly) to get out of Texas.

The Martian Manhunter tried to set Sara Moore up in a rundown abandoned lab at Spectrum Tech Corp. in Milbourne, PA. Moore thought J'Onzz surely had something of higher quality elsewhere, but "I'm afraid my access to any of the standard labs is no longer an option." Gee, and I thought having powers comparable to Superman's meant not needing that kind of Batman crap, like the car, the plane, or... the... butler? "Excuse me, Master J'Onn-- may I have a word with you? Alone?" Okay, where the effing H.E. Dubblehockeystix did Alfred Pennyworth come from? Alfred had recognized that Batman had really wanted to give J'Onn the information he had requested, but couldn't allow himself, so Alfred made a big show of doing it without Bruce's knowledge. In a story as poorly constructed and in as desperate a need for more exposition, we waste a page on this nonsense? I say again, non. sense. I could devote paragraphs to discussing how nonsensical just that one scene was, but the material doesn't rate that level of taxing exegesis.



Keane was the chief of Homeland Security. If you smashed through the window of his helicopter while in flight, gravely threatening the safety of its two pilots, F-16s would rightly blow your dumb Martian ass out of the sky. Never mind that once again, another character had to guide J'Onn J'Onzz to action, which is taken in the clumsiest manner possible, completely ignoring both the wealth of powers at the Alien Atlas' disposal and the horse sense of a remedial grade school kid. The reader was told the pilots ejected to safety, but that doesn't excuse unnecessarily wrecking million of dollars worth of government property. J'Onzz threatened Keane with a mind probe to extort information, and received a little verbally. Why not probe the murderous son of a bitch while he was in flight, causing no material harm and gaining a greater and more reliable degree of information from a subject beneath concern. Further, circular logic abounds, like Keane experimenting on the Martians because of the threat they posed because he experimented on and hunted the Martians after they escaped his experimenting on them because they were dangerous. That'll surely prove useful to know.



J'Onzz finally decided to mentally probe Keane, in midair, while being telepathically paged about Dal'en going berserk, requiring his urgent return, and attracting the attention of friggin' Superman. How many contrivances could a writer conjure up at once to prevent finally advancing the plot in a firm direction? None of which stops J'Onn's successfully arguing for a whole hour of extra time from Superman to prove Dal'en's relative innocence for a page and a half. Again, J'Onn J'Onzz is reduced to begging and indulgence from the Man of Steel in the series of which he is the titular star. Is this the worst issue of a terrible, terrible mini-series? My need for Excedrin Extra Strength and a multiple week gap in covering this god forsaken story indicates that it very well could be.



Sara Moore was having troubles with her lab samples spitting out skewed information, and suspected they might be contaminated. In her teleconference with the only Asian ever named Hollis, she called her working conditions "more gas station than lab." Till'all found some peanut butter that he seemed to like, but Sara Moore declined due to allergies. This led into an asinine observation about the human condition. Not so much stupid in itself, but when you reread this series, it makes you want to punch the writer in the ear for this song and dance. Further study revealed that the Martian blood samples were not compromised by virus, but simply "different" from expectations, presumably from J'Onn's baseline.

The Martian Manhunter found Telok'Telar and Mica'kel barely able to contain Dal'en, who was vomiting blood and increasingly violent. Surprisingly, the two healthy Martians wanted help from the Justice League, while J'Onn refused to turn Dal'en over. Dal'en got free, threw J'Onzz through a wall, and took flight. The Martian Manhunter streaked after Dal'en, finally catching up, and caught an albino tail around his neck. J'Onn thought of all his friends' warnings while he was blinded by hope, unable to see that Dal'en was in truth a White Martian in disguise.



"The Others Among Us Part 6" was by A.J. Lieberman, Al Barrionuevo and Bit. I'd be hard pressured to think of a series that calls more attention to how poorly thought out it is. Scenes in this book make me angry because I know from the perspective of having completed the series that they are pointless or nakedly manipulative to such a degree that they are outright cheats. I try to give the benefit of the doubt, like maybe this was a proposed twelve issue series cut down to eight partway through, with plots left hanging and characters folded into one another. I just can't see it though, because each issue reads more like an arbitrary eight issue length was assigned, and the writer just threw up a bunch of garbage to fill the page allotment each month. Either way, there's no excuse for such execrable results.

Compounding the author's failure is the improving work of artist Al Barrionuevo over the course of the run, as his layouts become more clear while maintaining a consistent, subdued mood. I also need to give thanks for the colors of Marta Martinez, which both complement the art perfectly and pick up the slack during Barrionuevo's lesser moments. You want to forgive the book when you toss through it, because it looks promising at glance, until the words get in the way. I'm so glad I decided to write the final issue synopsis three months in advance while doing research for series related character biographies. After these last few issues, I need the momentum of knowing I only have one more mountain of sludge to climb convey in my immediate future.

Brave New World

• Doom Patrol #6 (March, 2010) @ DC Bloodlines
• Wonder Woman #6 (Late May, 2007) @ Diana Prince
• Aquaman: Sword of Atlantis #50 (May, 2007) @ Justice League Detroit
• Breach #6 (August, 2005) @ Power of the Atom
• The All New Atom #7 (March, 2007) @ The Mighty Mite

Martian Manhunter #5 (February, 2007)

Over New York City, Giggs' helicopter was shot down by Martian Vision a psychic pulse, but made a crash landing in water...

Three days later, in rural Pennsylvania, DEO agents Forlon and Kewell appeared to be murdered for a package they were carrying.

Elsewhere in the woods, the surviving Green Martians were in hiding. While J'Onn J'Onzz meditated, Dal'en had wandered off to take in the local fauna. "...The diversification in this area is incredible." Mica'kel mocked, "The first thing you find remarkable on this planet is the plant life? Maybe we should leave him?" J'Onzz led the group to an isolated, abandoned housing project. Even though this was a ready made neighborhood, J'Onn insisted that no one knew of its existence. Not even, as Telok'Telar put it, "...the one who flies, with the cape?"

Sara Moore was furious over being dragged through all the crap she'd seen only to be killed out in the middle of nowhere by these "freaks," and in reply, the Martians left her alone in a spacious bathroom to cool down. Meanwhile, the group discussed Sara, with the usual parties suspicious of her of being a spy who led the military right to their doorstep. Even Dal'en expressed concern, so that only Till'all gave the full benefit of the doubt. "I think she's overwhelmed... and scared. I think she lost someone she cared for, and now she's confused. And I think we should follow J'Onn's guidance-- until she proves she can't be trusted." J'Onzz considered the matter settled, because the child sided with him against three adults. Which is worse-- J'Onn's idea of democracy or no one's willingness to just scan Moore's mind to learn the truth after so many other psychic violations have already taken place.



The Martian Manhunter announced that he would be leaving for a few hours to reclaim the body of the deceased member of their party, Jornell, to perform Ter'Ya'Moa. Well, except I don't recall Roh'kar getting that treatment. Also, Jornell was called J'orneel in the issue where he died, but was as of this issue referred to as Sy'rann. The spirit of Jack Miller was clearly alive and well.

At the Department of Homeland Security in Washington, D.C., Rio told Keane that Giggs was dead. Keane refused to believe it without a body, but he was less motivated by optimism than paranoia. "...It means he's gone rogue... Giggs would only go missing if he chose to."

J'Onzz returned to his skyscraper penthouse, where of course the Martian's body was gone, and of course Coneheadhunter waxed on about the 22 Martian words for "home" and the 27 ones for "friend" and nowhere near enough for "maudlin."

Middleton Woods Estates Housing Development. In Pennsylvania. Yes, really. The Martian Manhunter had gagged Giggs, bound him to a chair, and beaten him enough for blood to have splattered around his mouth and turtleneck. J'Onzz wanted to know where his dear friend Jornell Sy'rann's body was, and if Giggs held out, "the amount of pain I can inflict while still keeping you alive-- is considerably more than you could ever imagine." Hold up, Dick Chicanery-- haven't we already established that J'Onzz can break through the mental conditioning of these secret agents telepathically? This book is so dumb.

J'Onzz floated up through the floor to find Mica'kel and Telok'Telar menacing Sara Moore after finding a transmitter on her. Sara swore ignorance, and J'Onzz added that the woman who had approached Moore (Rio) during an attempt to reach the media could easily have planted the device without her knowledge. Regardless, Mica'kel warned, "We put our lives in your hands, J'Onn. Now two of us are dead. You want our trust, start earning it."



Giggs managed to break loose, and demanded reciprocity for his information. Mica'kel flew Giggs through the roof. That loosened his lips. Still, everyone but J'Onn thought Sullivan Imports would be a trap. J'Onzz figured only a Martian would know about Ter'Ya'Moa, and on finding his dear friend J'orneel Sy'rann's body, was too overwhelmed to notice the trap closing. J'Onzz barely dodged the internal combustion bullets in time, then young Till'all of all people pulled him away to safety. See, even the kid faulted J'Onn's logic. The spirit of Denny O'Neil also lives on.

The Martians held another meeting at Middleton Woods Estates, where the transmitter should have led Homeland Security already, but for story contrivance. Giggs couldn't have tipped anyone to J'Onn's mission, so Dal'en offered Sara as a suspect, but J'Onn trusted her. J'Onzz wondered if perhaps the Martians had been coerced somehow while in captivity. Till'all urged him to begin Ter'Ya'Moa, but that would have to wait until after the autopsy. J'Onzz pointed out that Sy'rann's chest cavity had reacted differently to the flames than other parts of his body, indicating that he was infected with H'ronmeer's Plague. After 53 straight days of setting purification fires for the dead of Mars, J'Onzz knew the signs well. J'Onn chalked it up to part of the experiments the group had been subjected to, possibly to develop a strain of the plague that would work on J'Onn J'Onzz.

Mica'kel and Till'all had enough of this bull, and wanted to bug off to another world. "The longer we remain on this planet, the more danger we're in. This is not out home." Being with his people reminded J'Onn it wasn't his either, but he felt he owed it to the good people of Earth to stick around, conscripting the rest of the Martians into doing the same. J'Onzz also wanted Dal'en to perform tests to determine who amongst them might be infected, or have the antidote within themselves. "What? No, I'm an academic. Maybe I could formulate a theory, but to actually synthesize a working antidote... I'm not capable." However, Sara Moore knew someone who perhaps could.



J'Onn J'Onzz and Till'all went for a walk in the woods, and the elder congratulated the junior's bravery in standing up to Mica'kel and Telok'Telar in defense of Sara. "Till'all, it's no secret Sy'rann was the voice of reason among the group. With him gone, I am going to need to know I can count on you." Y'know, the kid, who I can't recall whether it's yet been established is Mica'kel son. No mention of Dal'en, an even-tempered adult, perhaps because any mature mind would recognize that J'Onzz had not made a single good decision since freeing the group. Anyway, J'Onn was impressed that the boy still had a good heart. Till'all replied, "Growing up I heard stories of you. Now that I know you, I know they must all be true." You mean, like all the ones where he folds like a card table to make Superman look good?

Intuition suddenly struck the Martian Detective, "The most human of traits... It's what makes Bruce so effective as Batman." No longer blinded by what he didn't want to face, J'Onn reasoned that all the information in the world wouldn't matter without someone intimately knowledgeable in all things Martian. "Someone who knew me like no one else on Earth. Scorch."

Scorch?

Scorch.

Really... Scorch?

Scorch. Really.

God, this series is so dumb.



S.T.A.R. Labs Eastern Metahuman Detention/Research Facility. The Green Martian posse rolled up, only to learn the DEO had ordered her transfer "last night." In her place was the tossed together Justice League that skipped an issue after their cliffhanger appearance, which I don't think is how that sort of thing is supposed to work. Anyway, it's the Vixen, Green Arrow, Black Canary, Zatanna and Green Lantern Hal Jordan. Two people who nearly got J'Onn killed when he was unjustly accused in JLA: Year One. Another two who were among the survivors of the duration of Justice League Detroit, at least one of which having formed a close bond with J'Onn. Finally, Oliver Queen, one of J'Onn's biggest cheerleaders over the years, and the anti-Big Brother ultraliberal acting as an errand boy for Homeland Security. Totally makes sense as a Martian Manhunter hunting party.

These dear friends gave J'Onn exactly three panels as a chance to "explain himself" before one attacked without provocation... Vixen, whom J'Onn had previously hugged it out with during a Justice League International/Suicide Squad slugfest. His last words were "I'm not protecting them... I rescued them." Let's not forget that Vixen would be well aware that she has vixen powers, while the Martian Manhunter has Superman powers that make him pretty much impervious to any devastating "scratching" attacks. The Justice League followed through on this imbecility, and their group was defeated by the Martians... off-panel. Same Martians with well known flame weaknesses who were too weak to fend off some military helicopters. "...The battle is short, the injuries minimal. Little comfort though that brings me." Yeah, me neither. I'd trade in this entire moronic mini-series to see this one fight play out. But hey, it's not like you built it up for two issues and made it the cover feature on one. Oh, wait...

As it turned out, Scorch was the package carried by the two murdered DEO agents, and even though they had been immolated, Scorch was not the culprit. The Sleuth from Outer Space determined that it was instead the work of a Green Martian. I always knew Scorch was red, and this is the second time she's also been a herring. I love her being eliminated through the scientific process of "'cuz." Meanwhile, back at Middleton Woods Estates, Giggs got loose and made a break for it. Since this series' artist loves to use obscuring angles, you would be forgiven for not noticing that only J'Onn, Mica'kel and Telok'Telar had gone to beat up a Justice League. Giggs ran toward a large fire where Keane appeared to be standing. It turned out to be Dal'en, and he didn't look too friendly...

"The Others Among Us Part 5" was by A.J. Lieberman, Al Barrionuevo and Bit. Scorch? Will not come up again. Dal'en standing next to a fire? Nope. Story logic? After five issues of paranoid dream logic, you should know better...

Brave New World

• Doom Patrol #5 (February, 2010) @ DC Bloodlines
• Wonder Woman Annual #1 (November, 2007) @ Diana Prince
• Aquaman: Sword of Atlantis #45 (November, 2006) @ Justice League Detroit
• Breach #5 (July, 2005) @ Power of the Atom
• The All New Atom #5 @ The Tiny Titan

Martian Manhunter #4 (January, 2007)

Sara Moore stepped out of her shower, then talked to her cat about chess moves and her crummy taste in men.

Rio and Keene met with a scientist who explained the capabilities of the weapon used to kill Roh'Kar while viewing a victim's corpse. I at first thought this was Roh'Kar, but if so, it would negate a major upcoming plot point (not that I wouldn't wish for some intervention, like most any stupid plot point in this series.)

Dalen, Till'all and Jornell tried taking a walk outside, but were too weak to maintain human forms, and only the kid had a very loose command of English. He scared some girls in an alley with "Ahhh... it pleases me to meet your face," before J'Onn J'Onzz arrived to chastise their over-eagerness.

Sara Moore got stuck in the elevator with the talkative mailman, then learned from co-workers that Alex had died while setting off a bomb in an office building. The F.B.I. were investigating, but no one knew that Sara was with Alex. In denial, she cried in the bathroom and unsuccessfully tried Alex's cell. Still chanting "he'snotdead" as a continuous mumbled mantra, Sara was met by the mailman, who had forgotten to give her a package with no return address.



Rio was standing in Alex's former hotel room, trying to figure out why this of all the dingy dives was his choice to lay low. A techie sat on the bed, cross-referencing anyone within a ten mile radius against information known about Ferguson.

At the penthouse, J'Onzz tried to improve the Martians' shapeshifting ability and basic understanding of humanity. The two warriors were verbally resentful, the two elders found it tiring, but the boy was ecstatic. J'Onn and Jornell had a nice talk about the difficulties everyone was having with accepting their presence on Earth, even for J'Onzz himself. The Martian Manhunter felt guilty about not having looked hard enough for fellow survivors, leading to the horrors endured by his new friends. "J'orneel" was consoling, feeling they were simply victims of circumstance. "You did save us, J'Onn. And I have no doubt in my mind that you'll continue to do so." J'Onzz thanked him, and prayed "I live up to your faith in me."

In a private office, Sara watched the video Alex shot for her on his camcorder, explaining why he must now be dead, and what Sara must do to avoid the same fate. At about that same time, Rio and company realized from a cable bill that Sara Moore was subletting an apartment at 1100 Broome Street, almost directly across from the hotel room window. Breaking into her apartment, the techie caught a voice sample of Moore's from her answering machine, allowing the group to trace her via N.S.A. satellite feeds. Rio put a gun to the techie's head to rush him on that front.



Because the writer forgot he still needed it, the office of Dyer Investigations got un-blowed-up. This was so Sara could call that phone, which the Martian Manhunter's security system took note of. Don't they still have call forwarding available? Did cell phones wipe that feature out through obsolescence?

William Dyer returned Sara's call as she was riding her motorcycle to the nearest network news station to spill the whole story. Rio was waiting outside the offices of NTV, and after pretending to be an associate of Alex's didn't work, she threatened to blow Sara's head off via a nearby sniper. The Martian Manhunter snatched Moore up and flew off so quickly that only her disappearance registered. "Keane was right," said Rio. "It worked."

Sara Moore woke up on a bed at the penthouse, with William Dyer proclaiming his innocence. The Martians helped in the charade while in the human forms they had practiced earlier, but reverted back to normal as a way of selling Sara on their story. She fainted, hit the ground, and then missiles struck the building. Martian Manhunter demanded evasive maneuvers. Giggs was employing his usual subtlety, and upon seeing through J'orneel in disguise, shot him with his modified sniper rifle. Jornell's last broadcast thought was "Save... the others..." The rest of the group flew with Sara Moore and Alex's tape to safety.



"The Others Among Us Part 4" was by A.J. Lieberman, Al Barrionuevo and Bit. Continuing a Martian Manhunter tradition, the writer can't even remember his own characters' names. It was one thing to de-anglicize Roh Kar into the more overtly Martian Roh'Kar last issue, especially since the name was already a (potentially confusing) tribute to a very different '50s character. On the other hand, Jornell becoming J'orneel in the issue of his death seems like insult just prior to fatal injury. I wouldn't say that this was an intentional change either, since the two names are printed on parallel pages in the final narrow panels of each so that you can make them kiss each other. "Mmm, I love you, J'orneel! No, I you Jornell, even on this world far from home!"

It also irks me that John Broome, who never had anything to do with the Martian Manhunter, received the "Broome Street" homage. If it isn't Samachson Street or Certa Avenue or Miller Place or Schiff Square or even Weisinger Boulevard, I don't want to read it here.

Brave New World

• Doom Patrol #4 (January, 2010) @ DC Bloodlines
• Wonder Woman #4 (February, 2007) @ Diana Prince
• Martian Manhunter #4 (January, 2007) @ The Idol-Head of Diabolu
• Aquaman: Sword of Atlantis #44 (September, 2006) @ Justice League Detroit
• Breach #4 (June, 2005) @ Power of the Atom
• The All New Atom #4 @ The Tiny Titan

Martian Manhunter #3 (December, 2006)

J'Onn J'Onzz once again waxed philosophical about the nature of "home," or to be more truthful, whined again about the JLA breaking up and making more ridiculously dramatic overstatements like "Home. For the first time in all the years I've lived among humans, that word has started to feel... alien." Wait, doesn't that mean you used to be comfortable and happy here? I guess running into a group of plainly irritating Green Martians has made J'Onn feel ready to move to another planet?

J'Onn put the relatives up in a swanky highrise apartment that he sure wasn't paying for on a P.I.'s earnings. Once there, he chewed out Mica'kel for totally being solely responsible for killing all those troopers last issue, and not him at all, so don't pull his League membership, please sir, thank you. "I respect you, Mica'kel, but only a fool would mistake that for weakness. Kill anyone again and you'll have to answer to me. That goes for all of you... the carnage at the lab was unnecessary-- and wrong." Telok'Telar still thought, "The humans have done something to you."

I like Telok'Telar. He rocks the same basic outfit as OYL J'Onn, but his colors work better, and he's 100% behind being a jerk in a way J'Onn wouldn't commit to here. Most importantly, Telok'Telar went with the dual prong "Wolverine" head, where the Martian Manhunter looks like he was revised to sell okra for the Farmers Association of America. Coneheadhunter from Mars is a bit of a misnomer in its main venue, because the design really recalls the grimmest, grittiest Veggietale of all. Anyway, Jornell chimed in with "J'Onn's right. Without trust we won't survive. We shall do what you think best." Cue scene transition.



The airport. Alex Ferguson's plane was still burning as William Dyer checked the passenger manifest for Flight 21. Ferguson, under his alias of Alex Ferguson, had decided not to board at the last minute. Seeing as Dyer couldn't even wait around to see Alex off, much less conceal his identity, is it any wonder Ferguson continued running on his own? Not far, however, since he rented a hotel within a binocular's reach of his secret office girlfriend's apartment, whom he continued to lie to about his situation. Figuring his days might be numbered, Alex recorded a confession and warning for Sara Moore on his camcorder.

Rio Ferdinand reported to her superior, a mustachioed older man shooting clay pigeons on his palatial grounds. The gentleman was not concerned about the lab or any casualties, only locating William Dyer. Rio erroneously reported Ferguson dead. "Right, the plane. Giggs' attempt at subtlety, no doubt. What about anyone Ferguson might've talked to." Rio believed she'd tied up any loose ends with extreme prejudice, and that Alex "had no life." Her superior thought otherwise. "People with nothing don't run."



Up above the world so high, telepathy did J'Onn apply, trying to find this Alex guy. Failing that, even thought they were both still in New York, J'Onzz returned to find Till'all hovering invisibly many meters above the city streets. "I-- I just wanted to see them. See what this world was like." J'Onn chastised Till'all, explaining that it was too dangerous to be near the fearful Earthlings. "We're... different from them. And we're stronger. And they know that." On their flight back to the Martians' penthouse, Till'all told J'Onn about Roh'Kar's escape, the groups' past life on Mars, and a few details about their capture. Upon their roof landing, Dal'en joined the conversation, offering even more information on the group's history. However, there was an interruption when security monitors at William Dyer's office set off an alert.

Alex Ferguson's only lead in retrieving the Kuru Pendant was to visit Dyer Investigations, which was an office empty save for an answering machine. However, the building across the street offered Giggs an excellent view of the previously presumed deceased. The Martian Manhunter arrived in time to dismantle a highly sophisticated flying gunship, but overstatements cost lives. "I have fought gods, demons, aliens... even my fellow superheroes. But never this. Never foes who knew Martian physiology from the inside out." Wow, I've seen random dudes with flamethrowers do more damage to the Alien Atlas than this black ops team would deal in this entire mini-series, but you wouldn't know it from the hyperbole. No, the true engine of death in this book were phrases like, "It's okay Alex. You're safe now."



Not from napalm.

Good thing the bad guys already knew where the other Martians were, and had orders not to bother with the Martian Manhunter if possible. After they bugged out, J'Onn brushed off the napalm, and then immediately... determined Alex was dead, then swiftly... contacted the painfully slow in forming Brad Meltzer Justice League of America team. Meaning Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman were taken to the abandoned secret lab two hours later. The Martian Manhunter believed the powers recently employed against him could only have been wielded by or replicated from another Green Martian. Diana questioned J'Onn's judgment, while Bruce and Clark were both uneasy about the psychic invasions J'Onzz had committed against the captured assassin of Roh'Kar and the definitely deceased Alex Ferguson. J'Onzz also withheld the truth about the dead troopers, but guilted Superman with "Tell me you wouldn't do the exact same thing, Clark." For the Man of Steel, no matter how honorable the motivation, that simply was not good enough. All three heroes turned their backs on their friend, with the Dark Knight being especially pointed about it, because.

Even though it had been explicitly stated that the bad guys knew where the Martians were, and the Manhunter was clearly distracted, they hadn't attacked, because.



Since there still wasn't an official Justice League, the mastermind behind the Martian experiments called together a groups of heroes consisting of Black Canary, Zatanna, Green Arrow, Vixen, and Green Lantern Hal Jordan. This was done on the gentleman's home turf, the U.S. Department of Homeland Security. Even though Ollie Queen is possibly the most vocal liberal in comics, and everyone else had worked closely with the Martian Manhunter for years (including at least one instance of presuming his guilt in a frame-up that nearly killed J'Onzz and ended the JLA,) they agreed to bring the rogue Martian in, because. Because? Because Hal Jordan is a douchebag Frienemy of Mars?

"The Others Among Us Part 3" was by A.J. Lieberman, Al Barrionuevo and Bit. No spell check, proofreader, or editor was disturbed between Lieberman's typos/misspellings and the letterer immortalizing them.

Brave New World

• Doom Patrol #3 (December, 2009) @ DC Bloodlines
• Wonder Woman #3 (October, 2006) @ Diana Prince
• Aquaman: Sword of Atlantis #43 (August, 2006) @ Justice League Detroit
• Breach #3 (May, 2005) @ Power of the Atom
• The All New Atom #3 @ The Tiny Titan

Batman #550 (January, 1998)

A boy with cottage cheese thighs was strapped to a table in a laboratory that looked like a Hammer Films set, even with the computer bank. Rather than adipose tissue, the boy was made of flesh-like clay, from which a sample was extracted without any effective sedation. You never see eye patches anymore, but "Dr. Peter Malley, DEO researcher, Level Q" kept the pirate look alive. A six page overview of the various Clayfaces from Basil Karlo to Cassius "Clay" Payne followed.

Malley was working in the lab late one night, when his eye beheld an eerie sight. For his sample from the arboreal cage began to rise, and suddenly to his surprise, it did the mush. It burned a hole in the tank. The mush was loose. It was an ambulatory mass. It did the mash, melding to Malley's flesh in a flash. They were now a monster mesh!

The best part was when Malley (Get it? Malleable?) picked up the tank to look through the porthole with his one good eye while the creature leapt onto his back. The "Claything" merged with Malley in an obvious Dead Alive swipe, drawing the attention of a DEO agent, whose gun melted into his hand. In another Dead Alive swipe, a doctor later planned to amputate the agent's arm at the shoulder, because it was infected with materials from the gun working their way through his system. It seemed Claything could melt things psychokinetically from a fair distance, making it the most powerful Clayface yet. The creature had a childlike intellect, and began traveling from New York to "Mommy... Daddy... Gotham." Presumably thanks to Malley, it could drive a car, while comically scaring people and melting cops to mush en route.

The Department of Extranormal Operations was a new government bureau, so they didn't have a dedicated agent in Gotham City yet. However, Cameron Chase had just been hired, and was driving from the West Coast to town with a layover in Gotham to visit her sister. "Look like Agent Chase just got her first case-- before reaching her desk." The DEO knew Chase's unlisted cell, her sister's address, and her email without being informed, and forwarded all the necessary data. Terry Chase was a fan of super-hero culture who quizzed her older sister on her case, while Cameron lectured, "There's a fine line, you know, between hero worship and blasphemy... They don't deserve worship."



Harvey Bullock was as crusty and needlessly confrontational as ever in surrendering the Gotham City Police Department's files on the Clayfaces to Cameron Chase, calling feds pompous "tax-suckin' lice." Still, he offered, "Do me a favor... Don't melt out there, fed. Me an' messes get along-- but even I got my limits." Chase staked out the cave where several Clayfaces once resided, which is where she met Batman. Chase drew on him, and tried to run off the vigilante, but he browbeat her into submission with a variation on the need to do one's civic duty. As the two debated, Batman realized that the "Clay-Thing," might not be headed home, but instead follow a telepathic connection to its "parents" in Arkham Asylum. The Batmobile sped off, and when Chase's American muscle car failed to keep up, she called her sister for directions.

The Clay-Thing released Amygdala while burning its way through Arkham, giving Batman two massive threats to contend with. The Caped Crusader took down the second a might easily per story convenience, but there wasn't anything he could logically do to stop the first. That's where story contrivance kicked in, as Cameron Chase secretly had a super power that caused the Clay-Thing to melt itself. Batman was content to let the D.E.O. clean up its mess, but requested Chase see to it this didn't happen again.

Kelly Jones can be one of the finest horror artists in comics, and operates at a more consistently high standard than his most obvious influence, Bernie Wrightson. On the other hand, even as a pale shadow of his '70s glory, Bernie Wrightson operates at a minimum level of craft that far exceeds the Rob Liefeldian excesses of Kelly Jones. Despite being gifted in many respects, there are times when Jones is just plain objectively bad, as in random panels of "I clear don't give a crap" amateur hour composition. How can Mick Gray salvage this in ink when a page has a post-it note stating "I let my granny with the severe cataracts draw this face with a sharpie?" It's like Jones has a meter than runs up a $200 panel over here, so he makes it up with several $2 ones elsewhere. On the last page, Cameron Chase looks like a particularly sour Shirley Hemphill in whiteface and a bad wig. J.H. Williams III pitches in for eleven pages on his co-creation, and despite the absence of D.C. Johnson, nine-tenths of Chase's characterization works so long as he's present. That's good, because Chase was a cult favorite, but writer Doug Moench seems to be doing the "comic book adaptation" of her character here. She's a chain smoking rookie secret agent who gets into rec room philosophical debates over why she hates super-heroes with the Batman, as written by a guy who clearly favors the Batman and can't even conceive of a way to verbalize Chase's stance in the presence of the Batman.

"The Batman."
"But..."
"The Batman."
"I'm..."
"The."
"...just saying..."
"Batman."
"Yes."
"He's the Batman."
"Right."
"Didn't you hear?"
"Yes."
"Batman."
"Okay."
"The Batman."
"Fine."
"The."
"..."