Friday, February 29, 2008

Justice League of America #248 (3/86)

Gypsy: Adopted the baby tentacle monster, and having seen my share of hentai, it's a good thing Gypsy determined (?) it was a girl, which she called "Junior(?)"

Elongated Man: Unenthusiastic about keeping "Junior." Missed the now mummified remains of the possum family.

Vixen: Not at all comfortable about "Junior" or its mysterious origins. "I wish J'Onn J'Onzz were here. He knows every corner of the Secret Sanctuary." Continued to wonder about her roommate Gypsy's origins, as well. Talked about taking a skin sample from "Junior," which understood her and panicked. Vixen tried to pursue, but despite never being "sick a day" of her life, suddenly went weak. She then aged to infirmity in a matter of minutes.

Interlude: Kalanor was a peaceful, fertile world until, "the world and its inhabitants were his possessions... to do with as he pleased; to toy with... to mutilate... even to destroy, if the whim took him." While for a decade, things returned to normal, there were still some who worshipped him as a god. The escaped convict from last issue arrived there and set foot on Kalanor, flanked by white hammer-headed aliens garbed in purple robes. "It's good to be home."

Martian Manhunter: Private eye John Jones was on the trail of a seventeen year old runaway for his employer, but ended up framed for the murder of a woman closer to fifty. Eluded police through invisibility, though he insisted on continuing to talk to them while making off with the seemingly levitating smoking gun. Arrived with Steel and Vibe at the Secret Sanctuary in time to apprehend the escaping "Junior." J'Onzz exclaimed, "Gods of Mars" and the speed and strength of it, and tried to warn of Steel before the youth was blasted by its unknown energy. Took the form of a "Senior" to distract "Junior." Scolded three Leaguers for not contacting the rest of the group immediately upon "Junior's" discovery.

Steel: Managed to evade the casting couch by becoming a stuntman on a barbarian movie for Magma Studios of Astoria, Queens. When a rival stuntman pushed the offensive, Steel picked him up and threw him at the director. "I said, 'don't push!' ...nobody ever listens! Just like my grandfather! You think I say things just to hear myself talk? What are you, stupid?" Lost his job with the usual temper, but got a date with the continuity girl out of it. Punched out tentacle monster, but not before being zapped by the black fire.

Vibe: Blew all $500 of his savings on two months rent on a dive he won't live to make much use of. Hassled by local "protection" racket, and wrecked a city street showing them who's boss. Took the brunt of a second "black energy flare" to protect his good buddy Steel.

Sue Dibney: Westchester? Still?

Zatanna: Scooped up the ashes of her former roommate into an envelope, fearing one of her enemies may have killed the girl by mistake. Intended to take the dust and the girl's purse to investigators Dibney & Jones, but instead used her magic to follow a lead alone.

The Creators: So we're basically reading an anthology series at this point, right? Since the Crisis, there was the solo Steel issue, and then four straight issues of side stories featuring a divided JLDetroit.... except now they're in New York, so the unofficial title wasn't even valid anymore. As for foes created to battle this team-- well, General Maksai was really just for Vixen, so that leaves the Overmaster's Cadre and-- um-- is that it? That may be it, prior to the tentacle monster. Why didn't this direction pan out? Oh right, because it ate rocks, and I'm talking jagged, sun-scorched rocks.

Most Embarrassing Vibe Quote of the Issue: "Somebody get me a barf bag. I'm gonna be sick.

1 comment:

Adama said...

Damn, from the looks of things, its no wonder the JLA sales figures were in the toilet around this time. Yeeesh.